I told myself not to fall for him, but I did. I told myself not to fall any harder, but I did. I told myself not to get too attached, but I did.

Why do I keep doing this to myself?

This can't be healthy.

Could you find me? Would you try to?

In another land. In another time. In another place.

To say I love you more than life is misleading.
I love you in a way that makes life more.

I am going to make her a mix called, 'Sorry I Screwed Everything Up,' or 'I Wish I Hadn't Ruined Us.' Or, maybe, just 'I Miss You.'

I'm not particularly interested in my past.

I'm interested in my life, now. I'm into the future. I mean, I feel like every time I meet someone new, everyone's always like, 'What was it like to be discovered?' When, sort of, like, really, at this point in time, I'm just here with you.

I'm sad for the world.

everyone loves someone
but my confessions have no puncuation

it just is

I mean, I don't know how the world broke.
And, I don't know if there's a God who can help us fix it.

But, the fact that the world is broken - I absolutely believe that.
Just look around us. Every minute - Every single second - There are a million things you could be thinking about. A million things you could be worrying about. Our world - Don't you just feel we're becoming more fragmented? I used to think that when I got older, the world would make so much more sense. But, you know what? The older I get, the more confusing it is, to me. The more complicated it is. Harder. You'd think, we'd be getting better at it. But, there's just more and more chaos.

The pieces - They're everywhere.

And, nobody knows what to do about it. I find myself grasping. You know that feeling? That feeling when you just want the right thing to fall into the right place, not only because it's right, but because, I guess, it would mean that such a thing is still possible?

I want to believe in that.

I wanted to tell you all of my secrets.
But, you became one, instead.

She's too busy saving the world to notice that the one she should save... Is right in front of her.

Tell me why this guilt feels all too familiar.

Tell him YES.

Even if you are dying of fear, even if you are sorry later, because, whatever you do, you will be sorry all the rest of your life, if you say no.

The one person I am trying to reach is out of reach.
It breaks my heart.

I am so in love with you. You have won my heart. You tried so hard, and that made me love you more. Now, I can't reach you, because you went to that dark place that people go when someone pivotal in their lives has to suffer and die. I don't know why you won't let me in. I want to help you so desperately that I am withering away, knowing that each moment that passes that you stay there in that place, you may never come back from it. I am afraid that the person I fell in love with will have disappeared. Please, please, PLEASE, don't disappear from my life, now that I have finally found you.

So, you learn to just go it alone.
It's safer.

And, don't you know that I love you?

I love you, because I hate Taco Bell, and I can't be around my ex-best-friend. I love you, because every time I see a Mac store, I take a picture, and I know anyone can take a picture of a Mac store, but I take a picture, and it's my dedication to you. My, I-will-see-you-later, if I take this picture. And, I love you, because I still sleep with Luca, and because, every time I see something funny, you're the first one I want to tell. I love you, because our hands fit well together, and because, your freckles are like the stars that we put up on my ceiling. I love you, because I wear dresses, and I take pictures, in hopes that you will steal my phone, and think I look beautiful. And, I love you, because certain words remind me of you, and certain songs, I cannot listen to, and because, the stars look beautiful, tonight. I love you, because I know there are other people out there; Other people that would be better for me, other people that aren't manwhores, but, our kissing styles align, and our emotions align, and the way that you move against me... It aligns. I love you, because I can fall into your arms, and I could stay there forever, and there is like a haze over my head, and anything that is going badly in my life is fixed, in those few seconds, and because, you don't even know how you repair my heart. I love you, because my voicemail password is part of your phone number, and I don't know how to change it. And, I love you, because you never had McDonald's apple pies, before me, and because, you're cute in public places, and know exactly how to drive me crazy. I love you, because you break the rules, but I'm hoping you don't break my heart. I love you, because you cuddle with me, even when we're with your guy friends, and because, I love when we get lost together. And, I love you, because you clean my glasses for me, and can't spell the word Spanish, and because, we washed dishes together. I love you, because we make-fun of eachother, and you and I aren't perfect, or anywhere close, but, because you told me that we're perfectly unperfect. And, I might have been looking for that. I love you, because we're racist, sometimes, and perverted, and yet, you bring out the best in me. I love you, because we're not the same, but we're similar, and we fight, and you're so complicated, and frustrating, and I love our differences. And, I love you, but, it doesn't mean that I'll always love you, or that you are drowning, or that you have to do anything, at all. I love you, because you can't commit, and you make life brighter for me, and I secretly love it when you don't shave, and it makes me feel like I'm eighty, and we've been married for years and years, and now, eat jello in front of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, together, when I lecture you on it. I love you, and I'm not expecting it to go anywhere, and I'm not waiting for us to watch clouds on cloudless-days, and I don't want any flowers in my locker, or kisses on my broken toes, but I just want you to know that love, a love like mine for you, exists. It's there, and it's real, and it's always there, not just on every other Tuesday, or days when I feel like loving you, but it's always there, because I can feel it, and I know it, and when I look into your eyes, and when our bodies are molded together, after a second of touching, and we need no adjusment, I know.

 
I know, and I know, and I know, but I'm not expecting you to.

I love you, but it's not a fight, or a prison, or even, a cuddle in your bed. It's the way I run my fingers through your hair, when you lay your head in my lap, and the way, sometimes, I don't think we'll ever have enough time to say all the things we want to say, and the way memories upon memories replace other memories in my head of you, because there are so many good ones. I love you, because, it's always been you, for me, and this is honest, and raw, and I'm thinking Taylor Swift, but you set me free.